So my old buddy Davy and the young chick he is making time with showed up at the camp this afternoon with a nice load of firewood piled on the back of his Mazda pickup truck.
I think this was the third truckload of wood that they have brought to the camp, which is great because there is no such thing as too much firewood. Especially when the Summer turns into Fall and Fall turns into the dreaded long, cold, Canadian winter.
As soon as Davy piled out of the cab of the truck I knew something was amiss about him, but I didn’t say anything, I just got busy helping him to unload the firewood.
But, like a rocket scientist working on a difficult physics problem, I kept thinking about what was out of whack, what was it that had made me, well, just a little uncomfortable?
As the wood got unloaded I pondered the question, glancing over at Davy once and awhile, trying not to stare, but finding it difficult not to gawk just a little.
We got the firewood unloaded and then made our way to the deck of the cottage to sit a spell and shoot the breeze while the girls got supper ready.
When Davy and I settled into a couple of the adirondack chairs on the deck, it hit me….Davy was breaking a cardinal rule of fashion !!!! Yup….he was wearing shorts, running shoes and….gasp….socks!!
Now personally I don’t see this as the ultimate male fashion faux pas that it apparently is, but it wasn’t long before Wendy, always on point, and in Doctor Phil style, assessed the situation and cut right to the chase and the heart of the matter.
Yes, she immediately pointed out the fashion disaster that was sitting next to me on the deck, which got uproarious laughter from his young girlfriend Jancy, who immediately saw the error of his apparel decision and quickly pointed out, that she too, thought…well…I cannot recall her exact words, but “ridiculous” comes to mind.
Now…here I was in the middle of this mess. My best buddy is being busted in front of me by the fashionistas, the cottage fashion police, who apparently recognized it as a code 24, “man wearing socks and shorts“, which is thankfully only a misdemeanor, compared to a code 25 which is a capital crime, “man wearing socks and sandals“.
Needless to say, I was aghast and at the same time, concerned for the feelings of my buddy, who seemed to be quite taken aback by his untimely and unforgivable run in with fashion.
I on the other hand, have been something of a fashion rebel every since I got my first plaid sports jacket, orange shirt and bowtie, so I felt Davy’s pain, knowing that there would be scars that might never heal, especially when Wendy snapped a picture of the inappropriately dressed guy on our front deck.
Here is an out of focus phone pic of Davy and I sitting on the deck this afternoon. You will note I am displaying what I felt was the proper amount of “aghastment” appropriate to the situation…
Now I could go on and on about what happened here this afternoon, making fun of Davy and his socks, or on the other hand, I could speak up for men wearing socks, shorts and shoes everywhere, pointing out their “right to choose” and “men’s rights to look silly,” but I’m not….
On the other hand, I could also go on and on about the societal dangers of making a fashion statement, whether that be wearing a dress made of meat, Lady Gaga style, or wearing an “I Live To Drink” t-shirt to an AA meeting, but I’m not….
I could also tell you that AskMen.com are pretty specific in regards their opinion on the socks and shorts thing in their post, Sock Rules but I am not….
When men reach a certain age their perspective on things starts to change. They no longer think quite as clearly as they used to, or perhaps they see things very clear, and just don’t care.
It’s probably a hormonal thing and from what I know about women’s hormonal things, it’s seldom a good thing, so I guess when male hormones get out of whack, things can get pretty frightening, or in this case, silly.
I can say that from experience that I haven’t reached the socks and shorts stage, at least not that I am willing to admit here, but I can identify with comfort, and the seldom discussed in public (or mixed company) problem of male chaffing, something all men who forget to wear underwear know about.
Chaffing, whether it’s your heels or your other parts, is not only an annoyance, it can make you downright uncomfortable and cranky. I can’t help but wonder if the cranky old men get that way because of chaffing…
I am not going to dignify this seemingly benign, yet, horrific fashion
disaster situation with a blog post, or my own opinion, even though you and I both know my opinion would be the right opinion ….instead, I am going to show you the above pics of the shorts, socks and sneakers fashion….um…situation and let you, my reader, decide. I know you will get it right.
I did notice that Davy wasn’t at all cranky today, I suspect because he isn’t suffering from chaffing.
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